So here i am, sitting depressingly in my messy room with slow internet connection, computer, don't fuck with my heart song, hit by my first day of pms, opened snack everywhere, ice cream rubbish, and the most important thing is...ALONE and BROKENHEARTED
When i was eating my first cone, kind of saying flies around my eyes, it tells me like this 'ice cream=heartbroken now it's in my mouth, it tastes good, Damn! I am a brokenhearted girl"
I don't know when exactly but i think, last night was suck.
Aku nungguin kamu online beb, coz kita udah janjian sebelumnya kalo kita mau lanjut chat kita kemarin sore, kita mau lanjutin malam, dan aku udah pesan sama kamu kalo kamu ga bisa tolong kasih tau aku dan kamu bilang 'iya'. Is that my eyes that make mistake? or u really broke that? sampai pagi ga ada kabar. Oke, aku mulai marah, tapi oke aku masih sedikit sabar bahkan aku masih nyelipin kata i'll miss u....
Lalu aku putusin telpon tempat kerja kamu, dan tantenya temenmu itu dengan sok lembut bilang kalo kamu ke Pangandaran dan baru akan balik tanggal 26, FUCK you!! I know i have to say that, come on! it's too much. You DID it again, left me, hang me, without any words just to have fun. FUCK your ASS!
Jadi aku marah, dan aku tulis inbox ke kamu:
oke, jadi:
1. kemarin aku nungguin kamu sampai pagi, dan kamu ga OL.
Aku bilang sebelumnya klo ga bisa, kamu KASIH TAU dulu. kamu bilang IYA.
buktinya, BULLSHIT
2. dan aku tau kamu ninggalin aku ga pamit semalaman
sepagian karena ke PANGANDARAN. NICE. ga bisa datang ke *3 dan bisa jalan2 ke
sana. GREAT.
3. selamat kamu berhasil hancurin Natalku lagi. Dan kayaknya
aku harus siap2 dihajar lagi buat tahun baru. GREAT. Thx God.
4. mau marah, mau putusin aku lagi. That's another surprise
for me. Another "run away". More thx to God, Many surprise from my
boyfriend.
5. wanna hear mine? i still love u...hahaha..F you! enjoy ur
christmas n ur new year.
Hati aku belum cukup lega so aku sms temen kamu yang aku sangat yakin kamu emang pergi dengan dia, aku bilang supaya dia sampain ini ke kamu: makasih and happy enjoying xmas. Kamu tau dia balas apa???? dia balas: oke aku sampain :D kita lagi otw nih.
FUCK! Kamu emang berhasil membuat aku berpikir kalo mungkin aja kamu mau kasih surprise dan otw ke kota aku, but it's not gonna work. aku ga akan pikir kayak gitu, coz aku pengalaman sama ulang tahunku kemarin. kirain kamu mau bikin surprise, dan WOW kamu ternyata beneran lupa. DAMN IT!!!!!
i try not to save my tears, i dont wanna cry this time......okay! i cried when i took a bath, but it's just to make me feel better, i cried, a little...not as much as usual. i am enjoying today with having lunch, washing my ride, watching film, and blogging, DAMN IT, it's about you. Arrrrghhhhhhhhhhh,,,can u just go away today, this month........this two or three month and stop make me crying!!!!!!!!!!! FUCK you
so just enjoy ur xmas, ur new year, forget me, stay away from me, i'm broken, but trust me i just need time and i'll be fine. i am strong, dont worry, worry bout yourself coz u are the one who will be so lonely without me bcoz what? bcoz nobody will be so kind for you like me! u listen??? nobody....nobody will love u better than me, i am the best u ever had, and u dump me like a shit???????? so GO FUCK your ugly ass with ur small d*ck! an enjoy that!!!!!!!!!
